The Fairy Bell Series
A Coward’s Version of a Love Affair
Lined up like a full field for a horse race and he’s betting all on the 13 pony to win
by Jason Ashbaugh
Fairy Bell #1-
hip cocked to one side
hand sliding into the cooler
while the other arm is
out just a little to the side
a towel hangs out the back pocket
of a brand new pair of Levi’s
that already fit just so
long-wet-dark hair down the back
of a plain white t-shirt
cause she was running late
still needs to get the ashtrays out
and cut limes
some guy to my left smiles
“Don’t you worry about that honey.
I don’t need any damn fruit in my beer.”
Fairy Bell #1A-
some say the acreage
along the road to her home
is known as the bone yard
they say it’s sown yearly
with the twisted remains
of one hundred men
maybe more
but I’m no fool
and recognize an attempt
to discourage competition
when I see one
Fairy Bell #2-
interests
skills
talents
what you wear
and why
your younger days
your laugh
your hair
your legs
all of it
all of it
Fairy Bell #3-
In the best affected
southern drawl
that can be mustered
the bar gets
“Who up heah
ordered the
hot ham’ncheese?”
the end of this
just rolling
on and on
and God Damnit
She’s funny too
Fairy Bell #4-
Never seen a lady
that had such a way
of working the whole
Madonna/whore thing
at plumb level
got the steak
and the sizzle
just doesn’t happen
that often
all soft and breezy
it’s a gift to man
and truly a sight to see
Fairy Bell #5-
small, delicate fingers
peeking through
long, black hair
as they rub and dig
into shoulders, muscle and skin
I’m hit hard with a need to help
but can’t oblige it
because she’s the one
I’ve been worried about
she’s the one
she’s the one
Fairy Bell #6-
no timing
no chemistry
was just about
to say something clever
when some old drunk
knocks his beer over
she has to go
clean it up
wipe it up
I don’t try again
Fairy Bell #7-
Do you love her
as much as I do?
Do you wish only
to have the guts
to stare into the sun?
Is she in your dreams?
Handing you a beer
while she sits on some half done
porch out in the country
with a glass of ice water
reading a book
in her underwear
gazing up at you and saying
purring
“You’re okay now baby.”
Fairy Bell #8-
Got a picture
in my heart
and it’s raining hard
me and you
margaritas
it is simple
it is obvious
and it is small
in its scheme
but to me
it’s perfect
Fairy Bell #9-
trying to avoid her
at least avoid
thinking about her
has not been successful
see her lips
see her pale blue eyes
and the way she cocks her head
she’s deep in me now
and will not go
wind up having to say stupid shit
when people ask about my day
“Me? Oh, I’m right as rain. They
just played some Ernest Tubb
on the radio.”
Fairy Bell #10-
Her face is
red and tearful
and far away and
I can’t be sure of
what it was she said
but believe it to have been
some old, sad truth
that nobody like me
could ever fix
She looks tired
nervous and sweaty
She’s in a jam
She’s in the boat
that I’m going to miss
Fairy Bell #11-
sweet lady
I know you
you’re the one
who’s sable of hair
tall and thin as a reed
you’re the one with
a sailor’s mouth
and a dancer’s grace
and those hips
dear sweet Jesus
bless those hips
but you need a man
who’ll polish
not rub
you need a tent
a sleeping bag
a cigarette
and some quiet
just to see what
the hell is up
don’t panic
sweet lady
don’t settle
don’t think about
anything else
Fairy Bell #12-
they let her go in June
now it’s July
and she’s a
category 4
spinning around 180 mph
off the coast
of south Texas
going to hit Houston
early next week
she’ll bring rain
and gale force winds
she should not
have been fucked with
Fairy Bell #13-
For no good reason
I hear a hi-hat
a roughed out
G-chord
a one string solo
-Charlie Christian style-
over it all
and she comes
back to me
full on
out of nowhere
and every time
in my mind
the band
gives it their all
Fairy Bell #14-
never mind him
pining for the Bell
salting her into dreams
reminding you of
a whole wide world
conjuring visions of
some breezy pond
where the two of you
drink wine and
nibble on fancy cheeses
never mind him
helping you yearn
for unattainable fruit
never mind him
Fairy Bell #15 (Epilogue)-
I know I
hardly spoke
hardly spoke at all
but I promise
I noticed
every time
you walked by
Jason is new to bartending and has come up with a description for a small minority of the people that come in for the bigger shows he works-- Cocksuckers with Special Needs. He also has a man-crush on Richard Burton.
