this is why I got Caller ID
by Brian McGuigan
Jaime’s grandma called the house phone
only telemarketers
my mother
and friends had this number
I picked up
YO
YO
YO
like an asshole
but didn’t hear a thing
so I went on
in my best Indian accent
DON’T CALL HERE AGAIN
OR I’LL SQUASH YOU LIKE AN ELEPHANT
after a pause
a voice asked
is this Brian
I knew who it was
right way
so I hung up
what was I gonna say
it was just a joke, Mrs. Page
when Jaime got home
asked
if she’d talked to her grandma
she said no
but grandma called her cellphone
so I said oh shit
when you call back
tell her we moved
somewhere nicer
and they rented the old place
to a retired Indian man
with a bad attitude
Jaime didn’t understand
I told her what happened
and she said it’d be okay
her grandma could
play cribbage
with a serial killer
and hit it off
but still
I didn’t want her
to know
it was me
since this incident
we’ve visited her grandma
kissed her wrinkly cheek
ate her famous apple pie
but when we said goodbye
I saw it in her eyes
I knew
she knew
she knew
I knew
but both of us
have kept our mouths
shut
Brian works at Richard Hugo House, is co-editor of when it rains from the ground up, and producer of “A Night of Cheap Wine and Poetry.” His first collection of poetry, MORE THAN I LEFT BEHIND, was published by Spankstra Press in 2006. www.write2die.com
